Bridging Leadership Lessons from the Workplace and Those Experiences Shaping Today's Youth and Tomorrow's Leaders
![]() One of my favorite things about social media is when you are scrolling through and that one post jumps out at you and really hits home. A couple of days before Christmas, I read a Tony Dungy post on X and it was one of those moments. I had been so internally focused on preparing training material, creating new content and prepping for Christmas that this post served as a wake-up call. Okay, let me be honest. I wasn't prepping for Christmas. I AM the meme of the dad staring in bewilderment as the family opens their gifts because it’s my first time seeing them as well. Thanks Jenny! But it is a crazy and hectic time of the year as you prepare for family gatherings, the annual high school basketball tournaments, and working your way through multiple to-do lists. The post by Tony Dungy was so heartfelt and honest that I had to stop, reflect, and then screenshot it because I wanted to reread it during my own quiet time. Over the next couple of days, I would go back to the post and as I contemplated what he wrote, a waterfall of thoughts and memories flooded my mind. Christmas is a lot different than when I was a kid and even from when my kids were young. It looks different, it feels different, heck it IS different. But what hasn’t changed is the overwhelming feeling of love. Grateful for Feeling Small No, not that type of small. The cold, hard reality is that during the festivities and merriment over the holidays, I will not be getting any smaller! But as Tony Dungy pointed out indirectly in his post, the part we play in life is really very small, but the impact is oh so large to what really matters. The last few years, as a family we have been going to the Christmas Eve Service at Greentree Christian Church. This is a new tradition in my family but one that really becomes more impactful each year. It is an amazing experience that bring together sound, sight and thought that is felt ultimately with your heart. Grateful for Feeling Connected We spend Christmas Eve with friends which has been a tradition since our kids were small and something we have looked forward to each and every year. The format has changed, as has the people who attend, but the result of enjoying the connections made and friendships strengthened is always special. The cards and letters you receive have given way to social media pictures and posts. But while the method may have changed, the smiles it puts on your face has not. A simple text to a friend or receiving a text from a mentor instantly reconnects that connection with only a few words. A warm thought, a funny meme, or a family picture carries with it so much more than bytes of data. Grateful for Feeling the Enduring Love of Family After my dad passed away, we started a tradition of going to Waffle House on Christmas morning before driving to my mom’s. Yes, I said Waffle House because the floors are extra “slidey” and dude, it’s one heck of a breakfast place! My Dad LOVED breakfast and growing up when we traveled, we almost exclusively ate where breakfast was served all day. When my mom passed, the traditional Christmas dinner stopped as well. All my siblings and their families gathered together, and we chose to do a Fiesta dinner to start a new tradition. Understand that I absolutely love our traditional Christmas dinner that my mom made as it was the same at the Thanksgiving dinner, which I now make every year, exactly as my mom made it. I do miss it, but now we have our own tradition. We decide as a family what to have and it may change from year to year, but we enjoy the unity of figuring it out and then cooking it together. Grateful for Feeling Inspired I absolutely love the game of basketball and after Christmas, our high school hosts a boys and girls Holiday tournament which all three of our sons have played in and our daughter has cheered at, so the memories are bountiful. My siblings travel from all over to come watch the games and cheer on the kids. The game of basketball has bonds that run deep in our family. Former players I have coached as well as friends I have made through the sport will come and support our kids. Unlike past Christmas breaks, there isn’t downtime for me this year as I am now self employed. While kids are either off work or on semester break, my day continues like the days before. Learning, growing, creating, and refining services that can impact the lives of others. And I am loving every minute of it! While we tend to be nostalgic and reflect on our blessings during the holiday season, why can we not take the time to be grateful year-round? Because when you feel small, but connected and when you feel love and are inspired, then you will ALWAYS be grateful Beyond Today.
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Part of the continuing series on the The 3 Pillars of Impact: Varsity Edition where we focus on connecting the 3 Pillars to creating a culture of winning in the locker room. ![]() When I decided to adapt my 3 Pillars of Impact to be used by coaches and their teams it ended up being a straightforward process to adjust the wording and focus on the key principles that so easily crossed over. I have spent so many years sharing the concepts with others, the words flowed out. While the sports world has long been the poster child of autocratic, command & control leadership styles, they have embraced the trend towards a more servant leadership approach, much like corporate America. The impact that leadership author Jon Gordon had on Dabo Swinney and Sean McVay was well documented as they led their teams to a National title and a Super Bowl, respectively. They engaged their players to connect them to the larger purpose of the team. P.J. Fleck, the football coach of the University of Minnesota, wrote a book called Row the Boat that promotes a never give-up philosophy. I use his quote, “On bad teams no one leads. Average teams, coaches lead. But elite teams, players lead.” This drives home the importance of buy-in of the players and the impact they have on the culture. WHO LEADS THE TEAM When I first engage a team, my first question is “who is your leader? Who leads this team?” The response almost always is the head coach. As I restate my question, a few might speak up and throw out the name of a captain. I pause, scan the team to make sure that we are locking eyes and in that awkward silence I ask, “why not you?” Most of the challenges that a team faces are not caused by the coach. Therefore, expecting the coach to be the solver of all problems is not practical and can actually cause additional problems for the team. Problems can be addressed but many times it is only surface level solutions that tend to make them seem to go away when times are good. Then, when there is a rough patch, or when teams are under pressure, the problems will resurface, and chances are they will be bigger than before since it was never properly addressed. If you are going to solve a problem, you need to get to the root cause. That will take the entire team to aid in identifying the root cause. More importantly, it will take the team to then work together to address the fundamental problem at the root so that it doesn’t grow back. THE 5 CHALLENGES INDIVIDUAL VS TEAM I rewatched the video this morning of Shaq talking about his conversation with Kobe Bryant. Shaq told Kobe that there is no “i” in the word “team” and Kobe responded colorfully that there is an “m” and an “e”! This is probably the oldest and most prevalent issue in forming a great team. The individual player puts their own success and goals ahead of the team. I want kids to focus on themselves when they are developing their skills. I want them to work with a selfish energy and commitment to be the best they can be. The better they are as an individual will only benefit the team when they come together and commit to playing for something bigger than themselves. I tell kids that “I don’t care who scores as long as WE score.” Being a shooter is different from being a maker. Being a maker is different from being a scorer. Doing things that result in a score is what being a scorer is about. Making the extra pass. Setting a screen. Keeping the floor spaced. Occupying a defender. Knocking down the open shot. Or being a team player. SOCIAL MEDIA HYPE TRAIN While social media is only a blip in the historical timeline of media, the desire and impact of media on players and a team is not. Waiting to see the newspaper article written up in the newspaper or to what your name on the radio has fed many an ego long before X or Instagram were conceived. As a team, can you put the hype aside and focus on the growth of the team? Highlights may be great for clicks, but it doesn’t show what coaches and recruiters really want to see. There is not a coach worth their salt that EVER signed a kid based solely upon a highlight video. It may make them take a closer look, but it is their work ethic, their ability to make their team better and their character that really turns the heads of the recruiters. ECHO CHAMBER Along with social media getting you some likes; you can also see the “likes” happen by those who are around you. The kids will complain and take on the status of a victim and those around them reinforce that feeling without any real knowledge of what is going on. “You’re right, coach is a jerk. I don’t know why he isn't playing you. He must not like you.” Many times, it starts at home. I see it more and more starting with youth sports and carrying over into high school. The helicopter parent managing their child's success can’t come to grips when their little baby struggles. Ironically, these same parents can recognize when other parents or kids are being irrational but not with themselves and their own situation. “I WANT” VS “I WILL” Many a night, this discussion happens among dads over a favorite beverage while rehashing a game. Dads evaluate their kids based upon clouded, and revised memories of their own playing days as a youth. “I don’t understand. They just don’t want it.” Does that statement of frustration sound familiar? Having been guilty of this myself, I learned over the years that most every kid does want it. They all want to win. They all dream of hitting the last second shot. Of making the key stop on defense. They all want to be lifted on the team's shoulders and celebrated. They all want to be great. But very few will do what it takes. Very few have THE WILL to commit to being great. That is the difference between “I WANT” and “I WILL”. A team that has established a culture of winning isn’t necessarily made up of a team with every kid being an “I WILL” kid. But it has enough. They have enough “I WILL” kids so they don’t have to stand alone. They have enough “I WILL” kids that can influence the “I WANT” kids to do enough. To step further out of their comfort zone than they normally would. LEADERSHIP ISN'T COOL Another reality issue for parents is that leadership isn’t always cool. Their selective memory doesn’t recall that leadership WASN’T cool when they were kids either. Somehow, they forget that they probably called a friend or teammate a brown-noser or a teacher’s pet. Today, they are called “try-hards” or “sweats” or maybe they are “selling”. Honestly, my son to dad translator probably needs a daily software update to be aware of all the new phrases, but you catch my drift. Deep down we know, as adults, that this is all about insecurities and fear. Again, easier to recognize in others than in us, but that is another topic. This is why an environment that allows players to lead and most importantly allows players to fail is critical for a culture of winning. Remember, FAIL is First Attempt In Learning. Whether in a company or on a sports team, there is a continual uphill battle to build a culture of winning and success. Those challenges come from external and internal factors and are not solved by one person. The challenges are experienced by a team and therefore must be overcome by the team. It is through the team that a culture is built and through the team that winning will occur. It’s a team-built culture that wins, Beyond Today. Part of the continuing series on the The 3 Pillars of Impact: Varsity Edition where we focus on connecting the 3 Pillars to creating a culture of winning in the locker room. ![]() When I decided to start writing a blog, I made a conscious decision to maintain a connection between leadership in business with leadership in sports. I try to write in such a way as to be relatable to either environment and going as far to use sports examples in business focused posts and vice versa. Many times, it is not clear whether the focus of the blog is business or sports leadership and that is intended. When I first created the 3 Pillars of Impact, the training and talks were almost solely focused on the business world except for the occasional example where I use a sports analogy to help with clarity. But I always knew I would eventually adapt the concept to the sports world as the 3 Pillars of Impact are the foundation to building a culture of winning at both the high school and collegiate levels. In this post, I will introduce to you the Varsity Edition of the 3 Pillars of Impact with subsequent posts in the coming weeks to provide more detail on how they can be applied to your team. Facing the Challenges In my 3 Pillars for the corporate world, I talk about the Leadership Gap that exists and how it drives the Leadership Challenge that executives face. In the Varsity Edition, my focus is on the Challenges to a Winning Culture. P.J. Fleck said “On bad teams, no one leads. Average teams, coaches lead. But elite teams, players lead.” On a sports team, you don’t have the same hierarchy you find in the corporate world and the challenges tend to be more internal than external in nature. “On bad teams, no one leads. Average teams, coaches lead. But elite teams, players lead.” - P.J. Fleck
Breaking out the SWOT I enjoy introducing the SWOT Analysis to the players. For most of them, this is their first time using this tool. It’s a powerful tool to self-assess as an individual, work with coaches and teammates for 360* feedback, or to evaluate the team as a whole. The twist I introduce is to make it more than a static assessment by analyzing your internal strengths and weakness versus the external Opportunities and Threats. Based upon the analysis of these relationships, we create Action Plans that can lead to Skill Training, Practice Plans, and/or Coaching Strategies. 3 Pillars of Impact: Varsity Edition The Pillars themselves are the same in the Varsity Edition as in the corporate version. But how they are described and what is being emphasized is a little different to fit the environment. Again, I will dig deeper into each of these Pillars in future posts. Courage of Challenge
Driving Home the Culture of Winning Ultimately, if you want to build a Culture of Success at work or a Culture of Winning in the locker room, it starts by making sure the 3 Pillars are in place. Before I introduce the 3 Pillars of Impact in my talk, I get the team to share their perspective of what a Great Team looks like. What do they act like? What do they stand for? It is always enlightening to get the feedback from the team, to watch the dynamics as you seek input from the younger members of the team as well as the older, more acknowledged leaders. Once I have reviewed and discussed the 3 Pillars of Impact with the team, I then revisit what a great team looks like. It’s interesting to see more clarity in their answers. They can describe the behavior in greater detail. You can see that they are relating to what it needs to be as well as understanding what it can be. "Every team wants to win. Every player wants to win. Every coach wants to win. But it's the teams that honor what goes into winning and work at those things every day that will be highly successful." - Coach Shaka Smart As I wrap up the discussion, I come back to the "I Want" vs "I Will" concept that was introduced at the beginning during the Challenge to a Winning Culture discussion. Some straightforward questions drive home my point and reinforce what it takes to establish a winning culture. I ask for a show of hands to each of these questions:
That last question leads to the main takeaway for the team. It is an I WILL document which helps each of them build an action plan to commit to their team’s success. The first step of any journey starts with action. Remember, it’s not the "I WANT" but the "I WILL" that creates a Culture of Winning, Beyond Today. ![]() This post is a companion piece to last week's Ready or Not, Here I Come. I hope this will serve as a reminder for anyone out there going through a transition. From a job, a relationship, or even something as simple as a change in perspective. Doubt and negativity can always creep in if you let it. You have a greater impact on people than you realize I have written many times about the power of IMPACT and it is in situations like this that it becomes visible. It is not just the former coworkers that reach out and share an obscure story or memory from our past, but people in the community at large that reach out. And not just to me but to my wife and share with her their thoughts and feelings. Your circle, outside your inner circle, is bigger than you think It was amazing how acquaintances or past relationships will reach out to connect, share and help during this time. Some people want to hunker down and pull the inner circle a little bit tighter to keep others at bay. When people reach out to you, they are not being nosey to find out what happened and spread gossip. They care about you; they want you to know they care about you and the vast majority honestly want to be there to help you out if you need anything. Wow! Think about that. The culture of a company is bigger than the individual It doesn’t matter how you see the world or how you live the world within your circle of control. The culture of the company moves forward, and the reason is that it isn’t found on the walls, in the building structure or in the products that are produced. It is in the behaviors, values, and attitudes of the people. Therefore, the culture shift begins with the employees - for good or bad. My advice to my former employees was the same as when they were my coworkers, Leaders Lead. You can’t delegate culture, so continue to live it with your actions. The day fills up fast It’s on you now. There is nobody to delegate to and you are responsible for the beginning, middle and end of the project. You don’t walk down the hall to the supply cabinet, you head into town. One of my big complaints about the workplace is how poor managers allowed BUSY to replace PRODUCTIVE. People being active doing things doesn’t really matter if it is the wrong thing. If it isn’t moving the company forward toward their shared vision, then it probably isn’t of value. You now have to manage yourself, your actions, your priorities, your thoughts, your output. Be careful and don’t let your day become full of reorganizing the closet…again! While the distractions are many, you gain clarity as to what are the distractions When part of the company, you feel a responsibility to the overall culture so it is easy to get pulled into things that are outside your area. Now you need to lock onto your own Strategic Vision. Your own Purpose and Why. Once you do that, it becomes obvious if an activity is aligned to YOUR purpose or not. Don’t let anyone discount your worth Most of the time, people feel embarrassed when a change happens and when it is outside of your control, you feel helpless. It’s easy to adopt a victim mindset and feel sorry for yourself with a “why me” attitude. People are not looking down their noses at you nor are they judging you. If they are, then their opinion doesn't matter. Remember, your value isn’t built on the opinions of others. I am not my job. I am the husband of Jenny and the Father of Zach, Megan, Trey, and Ethan. The ego is dangerous It is the opposite to the previous one. If you have too much pride, you will miss the opportunities to grow, learn and feel. You shut down others, ignore the situation, and miss out on the friendship, love, and compassion that is being shared by others. The ego can force you down pathways and conversations that are not beneficial to you or others. Be aware, self-reflect, and seek out the advice of those you love and trust to make sure that you are staying grounded. Faith in God is legit! I shared last week about how I had not been listening for so long. But His word was loud and clear and has kept me afloat which has enabled me to be there for others during this time. Once your eyes are opened again, you not only see Him in your life, but you clearly see Him in the lives of others and sometimes they need that reminder as well. Your leaving might be more uncomfortable on the ones who stayed What do you say? Do you call? Do you text? Do you wait for them to make the first move? No, we are not talking about a first date, but how do you approach someone that is no longer at your company? Will you just be a painful reminder? I get it. I always struggled on what to do and typically, I wouldn’t do anything. I just went on about my business. Now that I’m on the other side of the equation, I wondered why I had so much trepidation to reach out and share. But I understand and it’s alright. Life Doesn’t Stop Ultimately, that is the summary of this post. Life. Doesn’t. Stop. It continues to move forward and trying to hold on to the past is a recipe for a sad and lonely life. I don’t want that served up to me. Be ready to hop on the train and move forward. You can always take time to reflect as you are looking out the window at the passing landscape. To remember fondly about where you have been but also to dream about where your life is heading, Beyond Today. |
AuthorTom Brown - a husband and a father who is simply trying to make a difference. Using my experience as a Manufacturing Executive to connect leadership from the boardroom to the hardwood to help teams grow and develop to make a difference in the lives of others. Archives
February 2025
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